the shadow of the acadamy
by HappyDaiz100
Summary: Ileana Rosenthorpe was happy living life at hogwarts but then one day she gets a mystery letter from unknown relatives... a parody of terrible Badfics. some other fandoms and internet things will become relevant. Also remember the name 'Copper Foxy' ;)
1. Chapter 1

The Shadow of the Academy

**(A/N:**** this is ma frist story so be nice. Also I love BOTH HP and twilight xoxox**.)

CHAPTER ONE: A LONG WAY AWAY

I sat in my dorm room looking at the letter that arrived earlier today.

'Dear, Ms Ileana Rosenthorpe' it read, ' your cousins would like you to go visit them this week so you have to go from England to America and leave your school for the time being, lots of love Mr. ( your solisiter).'

Oh goody (sarcasim), I'm going to have to leave Hogswarts and go to the middle of 'merican nowhere just because my 'cousins' want to see me for no reason.

In case you haven't guesssd my name is Ileana and I'm a student at Hogwarts school for witchcrast and wisderye and I'm in Ravenclaw ( no one cares about us L). My long red hair was in a ponytail and I was wearing my blue and silver uniform.

'Whats wrong Ileana?' asked my roommate Mackenzie Dobson, she was prettier than me, with curley blonde hair and golden tanned skin, ' my stupid "relatives" want me to go to visot them for no reason!' I exclaimed, I was very angry, ' really! Poor you ileana' said Mackenzie, sympathetcily.

Later on I was standing on platform 9 ¾ , waiting for my train. My bags were piled high and I was holding my small black and mwhite cat, called midnight, in my arms. ' Are you alrighte' asked Hagrid , the grounds keeper, concerdily , ' yes, I'm alright' I said dissmissivaly and got on the train.

While I seept on the train I had a dream that I was being chased by some crazed man, with red hair like mine, he was snarling and he occiasionally stopped to look in his antique mirror to check himself out. In my dfream I tripped over and other pale, snanrling people came and ate me.

I woke in a cold sweat to find the train had reached its destaination. And a small girl with short balck hair was on the platform holding a cardboard sign with my name on it. She waved at me. Who the fuck was she?

(end of chapter one)

**A/N did you like the first chapter? Please rate and Review :)xoxox Amanda**


	2. Chapter 2

CAHPTER TWO: STRANGERs

( A/N: so dis is the second chater of my fanific)

'Who the hell are you?' I said, too confused to be polite, to the dark haired girl infornt of me. She was about an inch smaller than me and her dark hair was short and spiky, kinda like lesbian hair. She was wearing, skin tight drak jeans, a ruffled cream blouse, a sparkly black waistcoat and small black heels.  
'I'm your cousin, Alice!' she said,in a perky American accent, ' ok, wear are we going now then' I asked looking suspiciously at her, ' to the airport which will take us to FORKS, im ameriac!' she walked a head to a shiny balck car, she seamed to bouce as she walked… I can't fucking stand people like that .

A few hours later our plane arrived in forks, and … OMG, it was the ginger boy (esward is ginger in da books) from my nightmere, standing next to a car waiting for us, 'NO FUCKING WAY!' I shouted, jumping away from "alice", 'I'm not going in a car with that!', I ran away as fast as my legs could carry me, ' Ileana, where are you going?' Alice called after me. Stupid bitch, her shouting distracted me so I ran into a lamppost and fell down, unconscious.

( some hours later)

'hey.. are you ok?' I heard a kind voice say as I was waking up. As the blurriness went away from my eyes I saw a tanned young man (he looked 20-ish) with bulging biceips that looked like they were about to burst oot of his shirt. His hair wag black.  
'yeah, I'm fine I geuss' I said trying to look sexy but failing cuz I had just been kncked out and my hair was messy.

He brushed my messy red hair out of my eyes and said, ' hey, I'm Jacob, who are you?' I couldn't stop staring at his choolate btown eyes, but then a girl who looked about 12 walked into the room, she had very pale skin and reddish brown hair, she looked angry,' um.. I'm Ileana' I said to Jacob, wisjing this weird girl would leave us cuz she was creepjing me out.

We continued to stare longingly into each others eyes, but then… I heard a glass smash!11

'AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH' THE weird little girl screamed loudly at us and stormed out of the room. Jacob had a pained look in his eyes like he was in pain.

'poor renesmwe' said Jacob, sadly

(end of chapter two) thanks to da people who liked this. Xoxox Amanda.


	3. Chapter 3

(CHATER THREE)a series of unfortement events.

It turns out that Jacob was imprented to the little girl with the funny namr. But when he looked at me the imprent brke.

' I'm so sorry about the awkwardness, said jacob', I looked into his eyes again, I couldn't stop looking at them. ' so how do you know the cullens, cuz I'm related to them but I hardly know them or whats going on' I asked, smoothing down my green ruffeled shirt and pulling hairs off my balck jeans. ' well,' he said, ' I used to fancie renesmes mother but she liked this vampire dude, Edward, whos your great great great uncle. Then they had a baby amd we imprented but now I love you' he looked at me worriedly, ' this is one fucked up family' I said, ' are they like, vamires or something?' I asked, ' yes. Wait, you're not shocked?' he looked at me like I was ill, but I just sighed and said ' well I go to a magic school with lots of weird creatures running about, so a few wussy vampires aint no big deal' Jacob looked relived.

We walked out of the dark quest room and walked down the glass staris, the Cullen houses ewaas very morerdn but it didn't feel very home-like or lived in, the house was rather cold and empty-feeling.

When I got to the main room I looked at the anemic faces of the "vampires" and let out a heevy sing, ' so why the hell did you lot invute me here?' I asked in a angry voice, I alredy knew that I didn't like the cullens, they seemed to controlling and rigighf. ' the bad vampires (I forget their names lol) want to destroy any libing relevies that any ogf us might have and cuz you arena distant relly of Edtwats they are gonna kill you' said the older looking blonde man ( its carlies btw). I signed, ' ehy do thay want to kill me, I don't see a point' I said, this whole "reunion" was redilous. ' they want to kill you because they want to wipe iut any whoman relation to vampires cuz they hate humans,' said Edwarad, who pouted and sparyed hairspray on his already perfect quiff.

JUDST THEN Bella walked in. 'guys, there is a blond guy here looking for Ileana' she said with a weird sneer on her face that disont seem to gom away.

I sighed; my "family" is so weird.


	4. Chapter 4 SURPRISE FOOLS

CHAPTER 4 (FREINDZONNED)

The 'Blond guy' was Scorpius ( Draco's son cuz this is after they groen up) and he came.

I walked out of the culenses house and to scorpius, "hi Ileanaa!" he said, smiling.

I was aboyut to reply but then everything around me froze and weird white crackes started cracking throught the sky and ground.

With a mighty smeash everything disappeared and I fell into the drak abysse.

James Gnome hated his job, plain and simple. He was the head janitor at the 'Institute of Fiction' and it was his job to clean up all of the forgotten stories, fill up plot holes and 'erase' broken characters. Sure, it didn't sound too bad, but there was only so many My Immortal wannabe badfics a gnome could take.

Today had started like any other for the miserable gnome; ushering Mary Sues to the incinerator room, shredding scrapped ideas, but something wasn't quite right. James realised that there was only half the number of scrapped characters there usually was. He sighed; James hated cleaning out the Sue-chute. As he grabbed his chimney cleaner, he looked around the dark, bare room that was his office; the only decoration was a bright red hat, which rested on top of his dated computer.

You see, James Gnome was going to be the main character in a children's TV/comic series called: 'The Magical Life of ' but it was scrapped for poor reviews. James hated his creators and always wanted to get revenge on them, but he couldn't get any time off of work.

As the gnome he heard a loud screech, coming from the Sue-chute, "WHERE THE HELL AM I?" the hoarse voice called out. James ran to the chute's collection bin and found a young, poorly written young girl with fiery red hair and a scared expression, "well young lady, this is the Institute of Fiction, and you my dear are a discarded idea," James explained to the flabbergasted young Sue, it was rather odd to have a character conscious when coming down the chute, "how the hell did I get here?" she asked, this time her voice was more genital, the gnome felt sorry for this girl, her story obviously wasn't very thought out and had been discarded rather quickly, "well you were a main character in a rubbish crossover fanfiction, but your author obviously got bored very quickly," James hoped this was a tactful way of explaining the girl's situation, his job wasn't very social so he often forgot how to talk to people.

The girl's eyes started to brim with tears when she heard this, "does this mean I'm going to die?" she asked on a small voice, her turquoise eyes growing almost twice their size.

"No my dear, don't you worry" James hoped he sounded comforting, "you can help me out assistant janitor!" the girls eyes grew once more, but this time with joy, "now calm down before you turn into an anime character!" the girl nodded and climbed off the sue-barrel and gave James a confused look, "Mr Gnome, sir?" her voice wobbled, "I forgot what my name was," she looked like she was going to cry again, "well now that you are your own character, you can make up your own name!" the girl cheered up at James's remark, "I will called myself.." she trailed off to think for a moment, "I know! I'll now be known as Copper Foxy, after my hair!" James smiled at 'Copper's obvious under development.

"Well copper, welcome to the world of fiction!"

AN: haha, like it? Well there will defiantly be more quite soon.

XXOXXO a teenage girl who is not actually called 'Amanda' (Happydaiz is the name and trolling is my game)


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: Pen of Godz **

Copper Foxy was enjoying her new life as assistant janitor at the Institute of Fiction; she got up bright and early each morning and tidied her office/bedroom, helps James with the chores and threw the Sues in the incinerator. Life was pretty good.

However Copper found this new way of life to be rather boring and repetitive, also from time to time she felt restricted as there was a cupboard in James's office that was always locked. No excuses. Copper had tried many times to get her gnome friend to open it, but alas, she always failed.

"Only senior members of staff can open this cupboard, and only for emergencies!" James had told Copper this earlier, as the cupboard held one of the most powerful tools in Fiction; The Pen of Godz (the Z is important because it makes it look cool). You see; long ago, when the internet first started, the Generic AI ruler of the institute noticed that many fandoms were being re-written by fans and were made into something that suited certain people's imagination. All was well in the fictional multiverse. That was until; the 'My Immortal fiasco' of 2006. A mass slaughtering of the English language spread across the internet, ruining many fandoms.

The Generic AI ruler and the un-named Elders of the multiverse decided to create the ultimate writing utensil, a golden pen that could travel to different fictional universe and correct mistakes made by illiterate fans. Unfortunately, the Pen of Godz was too unpredictable and the beta-testers found themselves being teleported to random places in random universes. So, to stop any more accidents, the Generic AI ruler locked the Pen away, only to be used for the big emergencies.

James Gnome had wanted to tell Copper about all of this, but he felt that she was too underdeveloped to understand.

xxx

"65 bodies of Sues in the tank, 65 bodies of Sues," Copper often felt it relaxing to sing while working, it passed the time, "take one out, burn it alive, 64 bodies of Sues in the tank!" Copper was quickly getting bored of the repetitive, body-burning work that was set out for her today. The characters were so quickly abandoned that most of them didn't have any facial features and were just blank, grey carcasses without any recognisable gender.

Copper had often imagined what life would have been like if she was written into a cannon universe instead of a fan-butchered one that was quickly scrapped. She could have been a feisty big breasted super heroine, or a bad-ass anime character or even a boring protagonist for a crappy teen romance novel would have been better than a forgotten Mary Sue. She sighed; if only the Pen of Godz wasn't so risky with broken logic, then maybe she could find a Universe that she could worm her way into and become a new character.

For plot convenience, James had left his office to go take a dump and left the keys for the cupboard on his desk, '_hmm' _thought Copper, _'now is my chance' _she can finally do the things she was just dreaming about. She entered the office as quickly and as quietly as she could, grab the keys and unlocked the cupboard door. She gasped. The golden pen was the size of a large monkey wrench and it was a clicky pen with a big red button.

Copper picked it up in the pale, shaking hands, "NO COPPER, DROP IT NOW!" James cried, his pudgy little face was red with anger and constipation, how could this girl be so dense. Ignoring him so the plot would go somewhere, Copper pressed the big red button.

Everything that happened next was a blur, James jumped to grab the Pen, but Copper accidently stepped on his long grey beard and then they both disappeared into a golden portal.

Xxx

(authors note) just a short chapter to keep the 'plot' moving.


End file.
